God, what is my purpose now?

Late night thoughts…
Lately, when I can’t sleep (which has been most nights), I write.  I write when I have a lot on my mind.  I have been thinking about purpose.  I always thought that my purpose was to be a good wife, mother, sister, niece, and friend.  I think I did a pretty good job. LOL. I had a successful marriage and raised two beautiful, intelligent women of God.  So, I know how to love, be faithful, understanding, share Christ, and listen to others.  I am far from perfect, and I know I have made many mistakes during my 54 years on this earth, and I am sure I will make a few more. 

  • My world has been shaken to its core more than once, but I survived!
  • I have let others steal my joy and gave them power over my life, yet I am still here!
  •  I had to learn to tackle situations and problems on my own with fewer resources, but I am making it work!
  • I have learned the hard way that sometimes certain circumstances, situations, and people in our lives are not always what they seem. 

Why am I here? What am I supposed to do, JESUS WHY ME!?

All this brings me back to my original thought… God, what is my purpose now? 

Merriam-Webster describes purpose as something to be attained, resolution, determination, and something that one hopes to accomplish.    

God tells me:

  • Jeremiah 29:11: I know the plans I have for you.
  • Proverbs 16:4: The Lord has made everything for its purpose
  • I Peter 2:9: tells us that we are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation
  • I Peter 4:10:  As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace.

Once I figured out that I had to survive and learn how to live my life in a new normal that I did not want, I had to rethink things.  Almost 5 years later (WOW, 5 years!) I know that I am still on this earth, living and breathing for a purpose. The devil has a way of putting us into certain situations to break us and eventually destroy us and leave us to live an eternity without GOD.  That would be my worst life scenario, to live an eternity without GOD!

However, after much prayer, an alter prayer of release on Sunday, and a conversation with someone who loves me for who I am, I know that God has equipped me for this phase of my life.  

“In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of his will.” (Ephesians 1:11)

We are supposed to be forever students, constantly seeking knowledge and wisdom. 

I can’t believe I was the young girl who never enjoyed school would say: I enjoy learning, I enjoy my classes, even the ones I complained about. LOL

I want to learn more, do better, and use everything I know to help others. Any gifts, talents, skills, lessons all belong to God.  After my alter prayer and conversation, the verse of the day was enough confirmation for me.

“And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased.”  (Hebrews 13:16 )

I encourage you to seek God in prayer, His word, in wise counsel, talking with those who love you if you are questioning your own purpose.  God has a plan for ALL of us and our job is to stay close to Him, press on, and walk in our purpose.  Don’t let nothing or NO one hold you back.

I love you all with the love of Christ!



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